“Karma is a Bitch!” How many times have we heard this and laughed it off and yet, I kid you not, it’s absolutely true.
How many of us have gone through the angst of a relationship that did not work out? We have railed at the Fates, we have examined our flaws to microscopic degree, we have – in turns – blamed or absolved the other guy for the break-up.
Certainly, I have been prone to this. From dwelling in the depths of depression and desperation, doing everything I could to salvage a relationship rapidly headed south, only to realise that the dude involved – the second half of the “Us” if you will – was marching to the beat of a different drummer! Clearly, we were not in sync with what level the relationship was at.
And it hurts, it hurts like Billy-O. This is not the ego talking at being dumped. This is simple hurt in its purest form, a grief that corrodes your very soul. While any break-up brings pain in its wake – no matter whether you’re the dumped or the dumpee – it is made more exquisite when you are convinced you’ve met your soulmate, the person who ticks most of the boxes and the ones that he doesn’t, you’re prepared to overlook because they’re too inconsequential in the face of this overpowering emotion that you’re experiencing.
So. I found my true love. My soulmate. Except, it turns out, he didn’t want to be found! Or rather, once found, didn’t want to stay! Whatever. Semantics. The bottom line is that we broke up. It doesn’t matter very much after all who did what. Whether he was the one to initiate the break-up or I was the one to finally call it quits. When it’s true love, these things are pointless. It. Doesn’t. Matter. What does matter is that rivers of blood flowed from my eyes. My soul is still in torment…there is a void left deep within me that cannot be filled by anyone else.
A Japanese friend recently offered a deeply insightful take into karma, which put this whole article into being. She said she tried to be a good person, never harmed anyone, so why was she suffering thus in her relationship – was this person meant to come into her life so she could complete her bad karma? And, bingo! Just like that, I was hit with an astounding revelation. I too try and be good, kind and helpful to everybody, from strangers to known people. I try and bring a smile even to a stressed salesgirl’s face by joshing with her. Because I firmly believe we can spread the love and the goodness all around this world by just giving a moment of our time in kindness…what goes around comes around and eventually, someone somewhere will smile at a complete stranger too. So, God – why me? I loved this person utterly and completely – why me? And then, piecing together from what my friend said, it was like a little voice in my head that went: He came into your life to be the instrument by which you could complete your unfinished karma.
The person who hurt you when all you did was love…if you think he or she is not suffering, then you are wrong. Social media has unwittingly become a huge tool through which misconceptions spread! So if you see people posting on happy—happy pictures, you assume all is going well in their lives and you succumb yet again to the “why me” syndrome. Well, I’m here to tell you categorically that most of what you see on Facebook is utter crap! The people who post on these happy smiling couple pictures are usually the ones in deep doo-dah! I know this firsthand because some friends who have confessed to extra marital affairs or cheating spouses are the ones who have these pictures up to show the rest of the world they’re a “made for each other” couple! Male acquaintances caught with their pants down put these pictures up to reassure termagant wives who stand over them like guard dogs.
For sure he is suffering and in pain too. After all, he lost YOU. And, if the breakup was a result of his manipulations then, no matter how many parties he goes to or how loud he laughs or which woman is by his side today – his conscience will not let him be at peace. We have an old Indian saying: “Don’t be cursed by the heart that truly loves.” I have always prayed to God that all the blessings and goodwill I get from others should go to the one I love, because he has done so much wrong that he needs the blessings to offset his sins. There was a time when he made me weep and turned away from me. Today, he weeps even as I turn my face toward the sun and grow stronger by the day.
As they say… Karma is a bitch! It comes back to bite you in the ass when you least expect it.